Get Ready, Get Set...

The plot is laid, the characters are waiting in the wings, and the story is ready to commence. Tomorrow, I can begin writing about Tara, Anne Elizabety, and Samantha (or whatever they're calling her today)!

Since I settled on the idea for this book, I've been jotting down ideas for subjects, or things that will come up in the course of the letters. So, for the sake of organization, I thought I'd just jot them down here, so that all my musings about this project so far end up in one place.

• I think Tara will not even divulge her illness in the first few letters - she hasn't quite come to terms with it yet, so she won't speak about it. When she does, it will at first be with sort of a nonchalance, an attempt to hide her true fears...
• Some of the letters will be "how to" letters...for example, how to have a bad marriage, how to really enjoy the sunset, how to bake a cake or make a pot roast...
• Since Anne Elizabeth keeps changing the ideas for the babies names, Tara will talk about some of her favorite names, or a time in her life when she wanted to change her name...
• I toyed with the idea of Tara having lost a baby once, or even had an abortion...
• The phrase, "just so you know" will recur in the letters, evidence of Tara's "just in case" attitude about her disease...
• Some other topics that will come up - organized religion, and her lack of interest in it (she will find just as much opportunity to commune with God in her Sunday morning walk in the park as sitting inside a stuffy church building)...listening to Renaissance music and thinking about the people alive in those days, and how she could be a descendant of someone alive then...
• Her feelings about books and words will also be a recurring theme...the library as a great source of wonder...how there was never enough time to read all the books she wanted. She will go to the library often and bring home "great armfuls" of books, attempting to devour them all. "For that was the great thing about the library - unlike most everything else available in the world, there were no limits on how many books you could bring home with you. They were all there, free for the taking, as many as your arms could carry..."

And speaking of books ~ it's just about time to get this one on the road...

Coming Down to the Wire

Well, this is the week the whole thing begins...NaNoWriMo starts on Wednesday, so "Dear Samantha" will officially be underway.

I realized today that I will be writing the whole thing in the first person, since these are letters. It will be easier in some ways, I think, because that's the way I write blog posts. The letters will be an extended version of blog posts.

I also realized I should have been using some of this lead in time to do some research on ovarian cancer treatment protocols, so I'd have a basic understanding of the first line of defense treatments, and the side effects that might affect Tara.

As the letters progress, along with her disease, there will obviously have to be some effect on the writing process...the letters will become shorter, perhaps, less cohesive. I don't want it to be too dramatic, because I want to keep the disease in the background. I don't want this to become some syrupy sweet, tear jerker tale. I just want it to be a thought provoking portrait of a woman who wishes to leave something behind to let her grandaughter know who she is and what life has meant to her. In that sense, it becomes like a deeply drawn character sketch of Tara, and the people in her life.

Tomorrow, some of the ideas that will pop up in the letters...

A Recap

As more and more players come into the picture, I thought it would be wise to do a mini-recap of who's who:

Tara Lysander Cavanaugh, energetic, outgoing, outspoken musician and artist, a woman of the 70's who reveled in life and all it had to offer
Richard Cavanaugh, her first husband, a rebellious lawyer, turned company hack
Ian McAllister, her lover, a British violist she meets at a music festival in 1993
Ann Elizabeth Henson, her daughter and Samantha's mother, a conservative idealist, who believes in old fashioned family values
Sean Henson, Anne's husband, a laid back psyhologist, who tends to sit back and watch as Anne runs their lives
Frances Lysander, Tara's mother, although dead, occasionally appears in Tara's memory as a demanding, judgemental, presence

And of course, baby Samantha, who appears at the end of the book as a young woman, finishing the last of her grandmother's letters to her...

The Men in Her Life

As of the present moment (the time when she's writing the letters) there is no man a'tall in Tara's life. The two "loves of her life" were Richard, her first husband, a lawyer, who started out as a firebrand in the 60's and 70's and ended up a staid corporate attorney, mired in company politics and toeing the line. This is likely what occasioned Tara's "falling out of love" with him in the early 90's, not long after Anne leaves for college.

Of course, meeting Ian surely made it easy to fall into love at that point in her life. Ian, the tall, British born violist, attending the International Chamber Music Festival, in Montreal, is instantly attracted to the tiny violinist (hmmm, I guess I've made her a musician after all) assigned to his ensemble. After two days of intense rehearsal, they unwind over drinks, attend a concert, and wind up in bed together. No one is more surprised about this than Tara. Ian encourages Tara's wild side, the eager, optimistic woman that she realizes has been sublimated for quite a few years.

Sadly, though their affair brings about the end of her marriage, it doesn't prove to be a lasting relationship. Ian, though truly enamored with Tara, is not interested in the "long term love thing." And Tara, much as she would like to be "free spirited" cannot quite give up her desire for a committed relationship.

And the effects of all this on Anne, coming up....

Who Are These People, Really?

Now that I've introduced the cast of characters, here's a bit more about the main players.

Tara, of course, our scribe in this tale, is a petite, energetic 55 year old. She wears her silver hair in a short, classic bob, which frames her elfin face and sparkly blue eyes. She loves to walk, and sets out every morning, rain or shine, on her "moving meditation. I can't quite decide on her profession - it doesn't feel right to make her a musician, since I've already given her the same name as the main character in Da Capo, who has to be a musician. Perhaps a photographer? Something artistic, for sure.

As Tara's disease progresses, and she undergoes treatment, her spirit will never waver. She will spend a good part of the book in denial of the finality of her diagnosis, determined to fight the disease with all her powers of optimism.

Anne Elizabeth will of course be a major presence in the letters. Tara will reflect on her own pregnancy and birth, and remember Anne as a baby. Anne's personality will tend to be less dynamic than her mothers. Though as strong willed as Tara, her focus is more inward. She tends to be more spiritual than practical at times, and embraces a fairly conservative religious outlook that irritates Tara more often than not. Anne, planning to be a stay at home mom, currently works as an elementary school teacher in a small, church based, private school.

Next up...the men in the tale...

The Cast Deepens

Of course, you can't have a baby without a mother ~ Anne Elizabeth, Tara's fiercely independent, but conservative, daughter. She drives Tara crazy with her old fashioned, right wing "family values" based philosophies. She buys only organic foods, drives alternative fuel cars, rarely watches television, gardens, sews, quilts - in short, is the "perfect" mother - of the 1950's! Sean Henson, Anne's husband, is a quiet, lacadaisical psychology professor.

And then there's Richard, Tara's ex-husband. Their marriage ended after 18 years when Tara fell in love with Ian McAllister, a younger man she met while teaching and performing at a summer music festival. Ian and Tara have since gone their separate ways. She and Richard have overcome the ill will precipitated by the affair and divorce, and are now good friends.

Tara's mother, Frances, will make occasional appearances in Tara's memory. Frances, dead at the age of 65 from a sudden heart attack, was both bane and boon in Tara's life. Always pushing Tara toward independence and success, yet never quite believing in her daughter's ability to make it on her own, she has hovered in the backgound of Tara's life, and now in her memory, causing her to question her judgement many times over.

So there you have it...the family tree...

Who is Samantha?

Samantha (Or At Least That's What They're Calling Her Today, as the subtitle of the book), is of course, our heroine's unborn grandaughter. Her name will change occasionally, based on her mother's whim.

Tara (the letter writer) is patently determined that the child is a girl, despite her daughter's refusal to divulge the sex of the baby.

Tara will refer to herself as TT (for Tiny Tara) a college nickname that she has adopted in favor of any of the versions of "grandma," which she completely eschews as totally unfitting for her personality.

More names to come...

The Plot Thickens

Late last summer, my co-worker's daughter-in-law's mother (yes, I know that's quite a few degrees of separation) died after a fairly short, but valiant struggle with ovarian cancer. I didn't know this woman, but several things about this particular situation were striking to me. She was diagnosed just a few months before her daughter's wedding, and had completed her first round of chemotherapy just in time to escort her daughter down the ailse. Secondly, she died 16 months later, just days short of the birth of this same daughter's first child.

As I vicariously followed the progress of this woman's illness, I kept thinking what a horrible sadness this must be, to have to face the fact that you would likely never see this child of your child's, this continuation of the life you were about to leave behind.

It occurred to me that, if I were in this horrible dilemma, I would want to leave somthing behind for that baby, so he/she would have some little opportunity to know something about me, to hear my voice, so to speak.

What about letters? A book of letters, from the grandmother, to the unborn grandchild, the one she knows she will never meet?

And so, the idea for the book was born....

The Story Begins

Dear Samantha....that's my working title for the big NaNoWriMo project, all slated to begin on November 1, 2006.

Yes, crazy person that I am, I registered to write a novel in one month. It's all part of this semi-serious endeavor known as NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) that occurs during the month of November. People from all over the world take part in this, and crank out all kinds of (probably) pretty terrible novels.

Aside from being completely nuts, the concept does have a couple of good things to offer. First, you get your "shitty first draft" actually on paper. You're freed from the possibility of trying to get it "right," and the main objective is just to get it "out there." If there are any redeeming qualities to the thing, you can always go back and work it out later.

Secondly, you're forced to write. Or at least, if you're anal and compulsive, you force yourself to complete the darn thing just because you don't want to be a loser. Yeah, all it takes to be able to call yourself a "winner" in this competition with your inner artist, is to complete the 50,000 word requirement by November 30, 2006.

So, I at least have a title, a concept (more about that later) and now...my very own blog, just for this project.

Let the words begin to flow....